“Before you call her a slut” by Joseph Vasquez

I don’t mean to offend by the provocative title

 

I’ve been a romance writer for the past few years, and in this time, I’ve been asked several questions; one question, in particular, made me evaluate my life in so many ways:

“So you write for women, and talk about how they should be treated, have you ever degraded one?”

My answer:

“If I ever did, it wasn’t without her consent.”

That answer got me out of an awkward situation, and even though it was the truth, it was not right.

I personally know four victims of sexual abuse, these women shared their past, and how it affects the choices they make today. The one thing these women have in common is the fact that they can’t explain why they seek something they don’t want, they don’t understand why they seek out something that has been so traumatic.

We glorify the sexualization of women, some use this as an excuse to treat them as objects, some use this to justify the fulfilling of vile desires. If anything, we need to glorify the correct treatment of women. Society adopts a philosophy, and the majority of people agree, the modern philosophy is doing more harm than good; eg: Everyone on social media “Likes” your half nude body, but if you become a victim of sexual abuse, it’s of course because of the way you parade yourself.

Women are natural survivors, but no one should have to survive the mental torture of sexual abuse. She is not a slut! She’s a Woman, and she is the greatest gift in the world, it’s time we treat her as such.

Instead of exploiting her, let’s give her the power to hear, let’s teach her that she is the gateway to life, and let’s teach him to respect and value her.

I live in beautiful, sunny Southern California, the longest I've gone without a dog is two weeks, and I'm going to write until I can't anymore.

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